Dragging Our Feet...

Feeling a little tired this morning. Teething has reared it's ugly head once again and is making a full night sleep for our little girl much more difficult. Sunday night was long as Zoey was up three times. We were tired but it's manageable. It's amazing how your body adapts and adjusts to the lack of sleep! Last night was longer, after the third time up I decided I needed to get her back to sleep without bringing her upstairs. Sometimes it's a difficult choice as just keeping with the routine is quicker and easier, but I wanted to give it a go.

The last time I tried she was teething as well, and I'de rock her to sleep until she went limp with sleep and as I would lay her down her eyes would pop open and she would scream. I'de try to comfort her, rub her head or tummy, turn on her aquarium, but she would fight my hands away and scream and pull herself up and beg me to hold her again. I rocked her to sleep again and again tried to lie her down once she was close to sleep. The same thing, she woke up screaming. I decided I would see if she would fall asleep if I went upstairs for a minute. In less than five minutes she was coughing and gagging. Zoey has allergies that result in a running nose, and when she cries, the nose runs more and it causes her to gag and cough and if we don't calm her she vomits. So I went back down and calmed her down. I think understandably I felt a little discouraged. After almost an hour she was still awake and anytime I turned to her crib she wrapped her little arms around my neck. So I gave in and realized in order for us all to get some sleep I brought her upstairs and fed her briefly. She fell asleep and slept the rest of the night.



That was a week or so ago, last night was a near exact replica, except that even after I brought her up she resisted sleep. I rubbed her tummy, and she seemed to need to release some gas. After a few minutes of gentle tummy rubs she was sleeping. I think getting to sleep needs to be a peaceful process. I completely understand that babies need to be able to get themselves to sleep, and when she isn't teething she is fully capable and she does. But when there is something bothering her, teething, stomach pains, otherwise, she gets much to worked up to sleep.

So after I had her asleep, I took her back down and she stayed asleep as I laid her down. Relief! I came back upstairs and crawled into bed greedily. Henry and I chatted about what we thought about what had happened for a few minutes and then curled up to go to sleep. Less than a half an hour later and she woke up screaming again. Very quick and sudden. Henry went to get her and brought along her Infacol. We gave her a dose and some more tummy rubs and soon enough she went back to sleep. She did manage to sleep the rest of the morning. I feel that it was gas pain that was keeping her up. I always end up kicking myself when we realize what the problem was, I wish I had tried something simple in the beginning. It's a learning process for all of us.




Henry and I are committed to praying for wisdom and help in raising this precious little girl and if there are nights without sleep to figure things out and to raise a daughter who feels loved and cared for, so be it. We are so incredibly grateful for Zoey and her continued health. Life is so full and we are soaking up every crazy, confusing, and exhausting minute!

Baby Blue Eyes

Zoey has the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. People tell me that she gets them from me and I think that is the most flattering comment. From the day she was born Henry and I have marveled at her big blue eyes. She has been wide eyed from the first hour. Now as she gets older these eyes carry so much expression. When she smiles so big that her face can't contain it her eyes dance. They crinkle on the side and squint. When she is scared or startled, her eyes get large and open. They try to take everything around her in and seems to be searching for someone to comfort her and make her feel safe. When she laughs her eyes close and then open wide when she tries to gasp for breath (mostly when she's playing with her daddy). When she is sad, tears cling to her beautiful lashes and her eyes beg us to make it better.



As my sweet girl gets older, it is bitter sweet in ways, but we are soaking in every milestone, every new sound, facial expression, and triumph. It's hard to believe she is almost a year old! It's impossible to imagine life without this beautiful blue eyed girl in our lives.

Delicious Fridays...

It's finally Friday and after such a long week, I feel ready to recharge a little bit. Poor Zoey had an incredibly tough week with teething. Every morning this week ended with sobbing and screaming. Some days carried into the afternoon, but we survived. Today seems to be going a bit better already but a good nap always helps!

She always perked up when her daddy came home. She is trying so hard to talk and when he would get home it was as if she would try to tell him everything she did. She's exploring the ranges of her voice, with high squeaks and low 'Oohs', it's been a perfect way to end our days.




Fridays are treasures to me. After a long week at work, I have the day off. So I get a chance to just play with my monkey. We clean the house, read, play with toys, and sometimes we even get out of the house! It's odd when you get out and realize, hey this is the first time since Sunday! It's a lifestyle I have adapted to however. Tonight I am planning on making Henry's favorite Ice Cream Cake. I was going to make it for his Birthday but since it had coffee in it, it was not allowed in January. I think it might be a nice treat to enjoy while we relax tonight.

This week I have also rediscovered one of my childhood loves, Adventures in Odyssey. It's a Focus on the Family radio show that's been running for over twenty years. My sister and I used to listen to them all the time. I would actually have them running as I would go to sleep. So it's been fun going through and listening to old shows and learning about the new ones. I was so sad to find out that the actor who played Mr Whit for many many years passed away last year. So it's a little different hearing a new actor, but I remember adjusting when the original actor Hal Smith passed away and I embraced Paul Herlinger quickly. It's the character that is treasured along with the people who bring them to life. It will always have a place in my heart, with all the lessons it taught me. I still remember specific things that I've learned and held on to that I gained from Odyssey. I hope maybe someday Zoey will find them a blessing to her as well.

Teething Can Bite Me...

My poor monkey has been had a couple days of intense teething. Yesterday was a tough one, she cried and slept all morning. Finally I decided it was time to try the Anbesol and within 30 seconds life was better again. The Pharmacist who gave it to us had put a fear in me, and seemed to be disappointed that we would even consider using the infant formula. We hardly use it, but it's a miracle when we need it. The slightest amount seems to take that edge off and she can enjoy her day again.

The poor little girl, it hurts as a parent to see her in so much pain, especially when there is not much you can do. I'm dreading the first Flu, Cold, and bad injury, but it will come and go and we will all survive.



Until then we will deal with the teething with snuggles, juice, Dora the Explorer, and the random dose of Tylenol and Anbesol. It's days like these where I am grateful to be able to work from home. I snuggle her in my lap as long as I can and power through emails, curriculum, and assignments. I've been doing this awhile now so I feel like I've been able to be pretty successful.

Last night, Daddy cured all ails while he played and giggled with her. He eventually brought his guitar down and let her strum with his pick. It was the sweetest thing to see her little bum bouncing to the music and her arms flapping excitedly when Daddy showed her how to make sound come from the large contraption. Someday Zoey will be able to appreciate how special it is to have a daddy that is more concerned about time with her than a potential scratch on a guitar. Not to say that we aren't learning the words 'Gentle' and 'Don't Touch', but moments like that are a beautiful thing.



Teething will someday end, and until then we will do our best to comfort and savor each precious smile!

I Wouldn't Change A Thing...

So I recently grabbed myself a new app. Henry got me a iTunes gift card for Christmas and I have been savoring every penny. Something about having that little chunk of change just for me is fun! I started with Bruno Mars' album, Zoey and I dance around to those tunes all day :)

The most recent purchase was a camera app. It takes pictures with my iPhone but turns them into vintage photos. I'm not much of a photographer, but I know what I like the look of and honestly, Zoey can't seem to take a bad picture! I think she gets a lot of that from her daddy.

I thought I would share some of the pictures I have taken. My gorgeous little girl with those big blue eyes, takes my breath away.

Trying To Do It Right...

Henry and I were chatting last night about Parenting. Man, I think of it as being a Mom is way easy, but Parenting, that's hard! That's just my personal spin on it :)

I've been thinking a lot about the pressure that parents put on ourselves and that we get from others. We were talking about how we all have pretty intense opinions about what we think works and what doesn't, but the one size fits all concept only works if all children are exactly the same. And anyone who has more than one child or has worked with children, knows that simply isn't true.

So the take away, we welcome advice from people in the know, I love to hear what worked for you, but when it comes to the decisions we make for our children, this club of parents needs to become a little more accepting. I know for me, I was a very attached child. I had a great deal of anxiety over the idea of having to be away from my parents or family. It was just how I was hard wired. I have to thank my parent for never forcing the issue with me. They were very understanding and in a way accommodating. I don't remember feeling embarrassed or pressured with my family to get over it and separate myself from them. One could have been very concerned when your 7 year old daughter is panicking over the idea of leaving for college. But I remember my mom just smiling, giving me a hug, and saying, "I promise when that time comes you will be ready, but you don't have to pack your bags anytime soon." The reality for me ended up being excitement when it came time to move to College. No tears were shed and I loved the years I spent there.

So when it comes to a daughter who has a little bit of separation anxiety, Henry and I are very unconcerned. My goal is to make sure that she knows she is loved, and is always able to come to us. Family is supposed to be a safe place to go and feel comforted and honestly I would be concerned if it was any other way. So I will not be pushing her to cut the cord, but over time I am completely confident that she will be able to strike it out on her own and grow into a fabulous and confident young woman and I can't wait. But until then I will hold on to my baby girl and let her feel safe in my arms.

Baby On the Move!

I've been trying to upload videos and it's just not working! So I am very sorry about that and I will keep trying!

Zoey is crawling all over the place! She is stunning! Over the holiday she really started to move and it was amazing. We really think she is going to be walking anytime now. She pulls up on everything and she wants to move even more. The little girlie gets so frustrated when she can't sit down on her own. She'll be standing and turns her head and half cries. So we are trying to help her realize she can sit down on her own and she'll survive. I'll hold my hand out and she holds on tight and plunks down. I want her to know that no matter what mommy and daddy are there for her and while we know she can do stuff on her own, we are right there for her, always.

It's daunting watching her grow up. It gives me so much joy but it all happens so fast that sometimes I just want to hold on to those moments. She sleeps so well in her crib now for naps that sometimes I'll cheat and just hold her. I've been struggling with feeling a little anxious about the whole weaning process...but I have resolved to give myself a break in that area. We have decided to continue at least to a year, it's healthy for her, and since it's working so well why not?



Work is going pretty well actually! I was anxious about how teaching and prepping was going to go after the holidays. Zoey is napping well for me and I'm getting a lot of work done and class is going great! My sister is coming over after she finishes work to watch her until Henry can get home which is awesome! So I feel like things are going well that way. I'm definitely tired at the end of the day and I'm always very much looking forward to the weekend. The Christmas holiday was fantastic and it was a holiday that for once when it ended it wasn't with grief it was with a feeling of, "Wow, what a great holiday!". We got a lot of things done and just enjoyed hanging out and Henry really enjoyed spending time with Zoey. It was lovely :)

Finally we are looking into some allergy issues with Zoey. Shes had a consistent runny nose for months and she also has the tell tale signs of red rimmed eyes and dry scabs behind the ears. I'm taking her this week to talk to the doctor and start talking about a plan. We've been using the humidifier, saline drops, Tide Free, no smoking, cleaned carpets, etc. So we will figure this one out :)