Putting It Off...
Posted by Ashley Duiker , Tuesday, April 12, 2011 9:51 AM
I've been meaning to add a post for Zoey's first birthday. Well it's been a few weeks and I haven't been able to get that done.
How on earth do I summarize what the past year has been like? It's been so indescribably amazing and huge. I've sat down a few times to try and write her one year post but the words have escaped me...
The last few weeks have been amazing and tough. Zoey is sleeping through the night....those who have been reading my posts and talked to me, know how much this concerned us. It wasn't a fact of not wanting or a unwillingness to get up with her, but it was a concern that we were doing something wrong. We also know that being able to get to sleep and stay asleep is an important skill. We are so so proud of her and so happy that we managed this milestone. It's as we told ourselves multiple times over the past year, there are so many times I've thought "I'm not sure how she'll do this?" and suddenly one day, she does it. The human body and Zoey in general is amazing and I have learned to have faith that God knows what the plan is for our little family.
I cannot believe how fast my little girl is growing up. I see glimpses of this amazing toddler everyday. It seems everyday she learns something new, develops a new behaviors or skill, and everyday she shatters our hearts with how much we love her.
In the midst of a fit where she thrashes when I hold her and screams till shes purple if I put her down, I step back and think about how frustrating it can be but wonderful at the same time. Learning big lessons, teething, and life in general can be tough and I marvel at the ability and honor to watch her learn even the tough things. I've always felt pretty good with patience with others, especially children. I am grateful for this trait as it's served our family well. It's not always easy but I hope that Zoey can sense how much she is loved and how unconditional that love is.
We have been reading Zoey Bible stories before bed and it's awesome. Henry reads it and we do the actions together, it warms my heart to be teaching her these important lessons and stories early. Last night we went upstairs to get her ready for bed and she crawled over to my bedside table with a purpose. I was about to tell her 'Don't touch' when I realized she was going straight for her Bible (a very cute pink one 'Just for Girls'). I gave it to her and she flipped happily through the pages. Henry came and sat down with her and they found the right story and she clapped and smiled as he read it to her. There has been a massive amount of ulcer inducing stress in my/our life for the last while. So much that some days I feel like I wander through my day in a daze. I feel as though I just need to 'Get through the day'. I try and keep my home from falling apart, complete my job in a manner that I can be proud of, make sure my daughter has plenty of time with mommy and feels loved, and manage time with my amazing husband. Some days this along with the other demands in my life feel overwhelming. However, I am in the process of relearning how to lean on God for everything and to take things piece by piece and not taking it all on in one shot.
Life is so amazingly good and I am feeling incredibly blessed. As people in the Province have lost their homes to fire and with what feels like an unending string of horrific natural disasters, I am grateful for everything I have. 
My sweet and precious Zoey has brought so much joy to our lives and we are so proud of her. We thank God daily for her. I pray she always knows how loved and precious she is!
Mommy and Daddy love you sweetheart <3 Always and Forever
