God, Love, and Prayer...

I realized I haven't updated on the Blog how things went with my Dermatologist appointment. It went well. Our Doctor was compassionate and determined to see me healed. As he was assessing my condition he did say he hadn't seen a case this severe in quite sometime. I suppose that was some what validating in a weird way. It meant that I wasn't being a baby about it but that it's truly a challenge. He prescribed some pregnancy safe steroid creams for me to stop the reaction. After a couple days I did notice a big improvement in how I was feeling. I have felt better than I have in months. It's not completely gone and I have the odd minor minor flare up but I'm not complaining as it's such an improvement in my quality of life these last few weeks. The next step is to get to an allergist to find out what the trigger is for me and hopefully for Zoey as well.

This brings me to thank you for your prayers. Henry and I have been amazed and humbled by the love and prayers from so many. We truly believe it's impacted our lives positively. Prayer is one of those areas that we strive to improve and strengthen in our lives and to pass that on to our children. This week we had the pleasure of attending a speaking event at The Gate where Dr Jeyseelan and his amazing wife Lizy (I hope I'm spelling that right!). They talked about their ministry in India and the amazing experiences they have had and what they hope to achieve in the future. I was so captivated by what they had to share and touched by their faith and sincerity. As they finished, they told the congregation that they would be praying for anyone who needed or wanted them too. I'm not sure why, but I've very very rarely taken advantage of these offerings. But as I sat there listening to the music, I was overwhelmed and I felt God tugging at me and telling me to go. In my quiet time of prayer, I have felt a strong sense that God has a plan for restoration and healing for me and I knew in that moment that God was asking me to act in faith and allow Dr Jey and his wife pray for me. Henry came with me, since by this point I knew I wouldn't be able to speak clearly through the tears. I'd like to blame pregnancy on this one, but I know that rather when you feel God moving you, it touches you deeply. As we approached the front, Henry spoke for me until I could squeak a few words out myself. We spoke quickly to them about the trials and deep pain that we've been dealing with and said we were praying for healing, restoration, and peace. As they laid their hands on me and prayed with urgency and faith I felt a quiet calm slowly come over me. I felt God assure me of his presence and his plan for us. I felt a renewed certainty of his love for me and my family.  After they hugged us and we thanked them we gathered our things and Zoey and headed home quickly. I normally would have stayed to visit but I felt I needed to take a moment to process it all. I am so grateful for the kind words and prayers of Dr Jeyseelan and Lizy, they will truly resonate with me for many years to come.

In regards to life in general, we are so excited for Summer to be here! Summer holidays for me means a great deal. It means having my evenings with my family, it means that I am not at my computer for hours during the day and I get to focus entirely on Zoey. It also means we can go visit Henry at the shop and see friends during the week, even have people over on, oh, a Tuesday! There are many amazing aspects of my job but the hours truly take their toll on our family as a whole. Sometimes I get fooled into thinking I'm the only one who feels the effects of the nights, but I realize that Henry and Zoey miss me just as much as I miss them and we revel in the additional time together. We will be kicking off our summer with a trip to a family friends cabin. It will be Zoey's first time there and we are so very excited for that time.

I am at 13 weeks in this pregnancy and I am continually feeling better and more like myself. I am still exhausted by 8:30 at night and the familiar pregnancy congestion has set in, I sound like I have a perpetual cold which is exactly what happened while pregnant with Zoey. While it's unpleasant, it's so unbelievably worth it. Even though I know it's going to be exhausting and challenging, we are already so excited to meet Baby Roo. Zoey is already prancing around talking about Baby! Although, last night Henry was telling Zoey that babies do not go in the microwave or on the stove (in her play kitchen). I think I felt some teeny panicked kicks and squirms during that conversation ;)

Finally, I got a call to set up my first Prenatal appointment with our OBgyn. I'm so excited already, mostly just because we couldn't love our Doctor any more so I'm looking forward to catching up with him.


It's going to be an amazing summer! And I'm hoping to record as much of it as I can!

And Then There Were Four....

10  Weeks

 

Well the name of this blog will change come December (or January)! It’s true we are expanding our little family and we couldn’t be more excited or terrified. Just like the anxiety of the unknown when you have your first child, there is the unknown of having a second. However, we prayed for this child and cannot wait to meet them and do it again. We know that Zoey will be an incredible Big Sister, it will be a huge huge adjustment for her, but she’s going to handle it like she does everything, a Rockstar.  To help with the transition we are planning on helping her with any changes during the summer rather than right before or after baby comes. We don’t want her to feel displaced because of baby, so the big girl changes will happen months before. The changes are nothing too major but we do plan to move her room, which will be a change but we are going to make it as exciting as we possibly can! We found some amazing wall decals for cheap cheap cheap at Walmart. So she gets the Heffalump room she wants without the mural painting (which did turn out amazing).

12 Weeks

 I am 12 weeks along in this pregnancy and a lot of things have been different and very similar. I’ve popped way earlier than I did with Zoey but I expected that as it happens with second pregnancies. I felt  oh so sick in the first few months but never clinging to the porcelain sick that some have, for this I have been grateful. I’ve experienced a bizarre and frustrating hunger when I am not nauseous. Like, ‘I don’t think I can get this food in my mouth fast enough’ hunger. It’s lessening now, thank heavens, otherwise I feared I would gain 100 pounds this time around. I was pleasantly surprised at my first appointment that I am below any number I imagined at this point, so cheers to that!

Waiting to be a Big Sister is tough...

Our first Prenatal appointment was much more eventful than my previous appointments with Zoey. It started the same as any other, I peed in a cup and then put on those pretty gowns (can’t they get a material that’s not pastel and see through?). The doctor came in and he started checking my stomach and all those fun things. Then he said he'd try the Doppler to find the heartbeat which was why I had asked Henry to come with me, the first heartbeat is so exciting. First try and he couldn't quite find it so he said he'd do the pelvic exam first and maybe get baby moving for him. So we did that and then he tried the Doppler again. No dice, they got a different machine to try and for probably 7- 10 minutes he tried to find the heartbeat with no luck. So at first I was bummed that Henry missed work to come to the appointment and didn't get to hear a heartbeat. Then I realized our Doctor seemed to be thinking a lot. I got dressed and I told Henry I hadn't even considered the alternative, that something could be wrong. We were remarkably unstressed. Doctor came back and said everything looks good, and my cervix looks like I'm pregnant. I was sensing a but....and the he said, just to be safe he wanted to send me for an ultrasound....today (Friday). He took us that he really didn't want us to worry, that nine times out of ten the baby is just hiding, but that in his years practicing he's seen the alternative so he wanted to be safe. I truly appreciated his desire to be careful and through with mine and Baby Roo’s health.

So we went to the booking clerk and started chugging water, thankfully I have been practicing more regular water intake so I had a big bottle with me. I drank over  4 cups in 5 minutes, and then we were off straight to the hospital. I got a little misty as I was processing it all but Henry and I were staying calm. We went to the hospital and got shuffled back to Diagnostic Imaging all within 20 minutes. I went in for the ultrasound by myself at first and the incredibly kind ultrasound tech told me within 2 seconds of looking and said, “There's a baby and a heartbeat”. Sweet relief.

After they did all the measurements and checks they said Baby Roo is 11 weeks (12 now) and looks great. Henry came in with Zoey and they showed us the screen and I burst into tears. A perfect little baby in there kicking and bouncing away. Baby doesn't look like a tadpole anymore, it's a baby! :) We could see a head, two hands, fingers, feet, and bum....perfect. So a whirlwind morning ended with the greatest moment. Honestly we know that God gave us yesterday as a gift.

We are so so grateful and gosh this pregnancy feels almost all of a sudden real! So that meant it was time to start documenting Baby Roo the best I can! Summer is right around the corner so I plan to record as much as I can of our last summer as a family of three.

The Last Two Weeks...

I went to see the Naturopath and I think I had some lofty expectations and hopes. I was hoping she would talk to me and be able to immediately pinpoint the problem with a simple fix. I found her to be very empathetic and kind. Her recommendation to us was for both Zoey and I to go off Gluten and Dairy for a few weeks and see if that is the cause of the problems. I was excited to try it out and hopefully experience some relief. We made the decision to just have myself try the diet change. With a skinny, already picky eater, we weren't keen on forcing something on her and having her lose weight. We have reduced the Gluten and Dairy where we can in her diet and she's done well with that.

The change in diet was overwhelming at first but once I was able to wrap my head around and along with some suggestions and help from my sister and best friend I settled in comfortably. Don't get me wrong, I would adore having a glass of Milk, Almond Milk just isn't the same. Removing Gluten from my diet has been the easier part for me. It's been fun learning and experimenting with all the different Gluten Free flours, I think I have five different types in my pantry!

My face on Monday....with makeup on

Unfortunately, the changes in diet haven't helped with my skin and discomfort. I'm just shy of 3 weeks into it and it has actually been much worse during that time. I know that there is a period of detox that can make it worse in the first few days, but I would have hoped that wouldn't last this long. I went to our Family Doctor a week ago to update him on where I am at and ask for a referral to a Dermatologist. That day my face was covered in red and dry spots. My eyes were swollen and red. As I sat in the Doctors waiting room I thought people were looking at my cutie pie daughter when I realized they were looking at me. I forgot I looked the way I did. The nurse came to get me and gasped. My Doctor felt badly for me and quickly agreed to refer me to a Dermatologist in Calgary and ordered some more blood tests. One definite answer to prayer that came out of that day was a prescribed cream for Zoey's symptoms. With a little more consistency, it cleared it completely up! What an amazing blessing.

My healthy little girl

I get to see the Dermatologist already, thanks to my Mom's inside track on referrals, we go on Monday. It's amazing since the typical wait time in Lethbridge is around 6 months. So we are praying that something positive will come of the appointment. I need to optimistic. Last night I was up for hours and finally got up utterly exhausted and frustrated. I couldn't stop scratching and my skin is feeling raw and sore. The last three mornings my skin is incredibly tight and dry and my eyes are puffed and red. With no exaggeration, the bags under my eyes looks like one of the Hecklers from The Muppets. It's not a great look.

So I am trying to be faithful and trusting that God will have a solution and healing for me soon. But to be honest the last couple weeks and even more so the last couple days have worn on me and I am feeling spent. I am incredibly grateful for my family and friends who have been so supportive and encouraging. Henry has been a life line through it all. I have no idea how he manages to make me feel beautiful in the midst of it all, but he does. I am so blessed.

I love my husband

So if you are able, keep us in your prayers, especially on Monday, that we would be gifted with a treatment. And maybe even some cheesy pasta on the way home ;)
 

Prayer Request

I am hoping Tuesday brings good news for us. Tuesday is when Zoey and I will be seeing a very reputable Naturopath Doctor for our skin issues. Perhaps I should catch you up.

It started in October for me, continuously itchy skin and very dry patches on my neck. I saw my family doctor about it and we started slowly, one by one, removing any potential causes. I use all non fragrance and hypo allergenic soaps, lotions, and detergent. I've tried what feels like every possible supplement and online suggestion. Most seemed to either make it worse, or do almost nothing. I've been trying Coconut Oil as a moisturizer for at least a month now and it helps me feel hydrated for at most an hour. It's progressed since then and now my face is perpetually dry and my neck seems to be permanently red and painfully dry. My legs are patchy and dry as well. It was frustrating enough until about a month ago we started to really notice a small patch of 'Eczema' on Zoey's foot expanding and getting more and more irritated. We noticed she was scratching a lot and the patch was now on both feet and had spread to her hands.

Any parent can tell you, when you're sick it's hard enough but it see it on your child is too much. So in our latest push to find an answer we are going to see our highly recommended doctor. I am praying that she will find an answer for us, one that we can treat simply.

I've kept these struggles mostly to my self as I've felt incredibly self conscious about it. I feel frustrated that I can't explain it to myself, let alone anyone else around me. The progress on to my face likely seems more apparent to myself than others most days but it is frustrating, draining, and uncomfortable.

So we will take your prayers gladly, and I am praying that we will see some positive outcomes soon!

Happy 2nd Birthday Zoey

Dear Zoey,

You’re TWO now! I know it sounds cliched, but it’s amazing to me how fast time has gone by. It been the most amazing, challenging, unforgettable, untradeable two years. We have watched you learn so much and develop from a baby into a toddler. I can remember when you were just 3 months old and wondering how on earth you would transform from laying on the floor to a baby who could sit on her own. I’ve worked with children all my life but to see you do it, was like watching a miracle. I knew you could do it, I think you can do anything.

Now you’ve moved into a Big Girl bed! We made a big deal out of it and let you pick your very own bedding. You grabbed the Tinkerbell bedding off the shelf by yourself and hauled it to the cart. You squealed and jumped on the new bed and were so thrilled to see it set up. As with any new changes you were nervous going to sleep at first but now you lie down and if Mommy or Daddy sits with you for just a few minutes you roll over and fall fast asleep. I cannot tell you enough, how proud I am of you.

You are so bright Zoey and kind and loving. You make everyone you come in contact with feel your special joy. You blow kisses to anyone who waves, if you’re not overwhelmed with teething pain, you have a smile and a giggle for everyone. You enjoy playing with toys and the iPad. You’re so incredibly smart. When others see how comfortable you are with technology, with your blocks, with your motor skills they are amazed.

We are so grateful and amazed by you. You’re personality and spirit have brought so much more to our lives than we could have ever imagined. EVERY day is more interesting and amazing than the day before.

We love you Zoey Faith....Always and Forever

A Breather....

Zoey had an amazing week. It was such a gift to us. She had relief from teething which meant we saw more and more of our sweet, happy, and joyful little girl. It also meant she ate! She happily ate all the meals we set in front of her (still a little picky) but she ate! It's been as if her body knows it needs make up for the lack of hearty calories while teething. Her new favorite snacks are Multi grain Cheerios, Honey Bunches of Oats, and Veggie Sticks. She loves Macaroni and Cheese like any other toddler and sandwiches cut into hearts or stars (cookie cutter). I've added Green Juice everyday to my diet with a scoop of Chia Seeds and Zoey happily shares that with me. So it's been amazing to see her enjoying mealtime and getting what she needs.




I've cut down on the amount of TV we watch during the day as well. I will full admit I was relying too heavily on Mickey to distract Zoey long enough for me to get my work done. I'm not saying that we won't put a show on for Zoey if we need to get supper made but I've been making a stronger and more conscious effort to try other strategies. She adores Play-Doh, playing with her dolls, blocks, cars, and kitchen. I find that setting up a center or a new activities at the end of the day makes her crazy happy. She is at the age where I can set her up and she goes from there. I love watching her mind work and the discoveries she makes along the way.



All the positives last week and I still found myself dragging my feet. I was mentally drained and I wasn't sure why. Before we could get out of the car to go to the final Spiritual Growth Month meeting, I burst into tears. I grabbed Henry's hand and said, "Not yet." A short minute later I had gathered myself and we headed inside. Then, surrounded by our friends and family, I felt calmer. Zoey had fallen asleep and we were able to sit quietly to listen to the message. After we had a chance to visit some more and even made plans for the following Sunday.



It occurred to me that the busyness of work and our schedules that keep us from having regular family meals together, also keeps us often from our friends. We do our best, but last week got the best of us in constant movement and passing each other as we sprinted to the next activity. I'm 5 years into this job and it's still a struggle sometimes, but I'm grateful. I'm continuing to change my heart and attitude about all areas of life. God is drawing me in closer and closer prompting me to turn to Him for support and direction. In my bones I feel changes, big, small, good, and who knows maybe not so exciting. But we've been learning more and more everyday about how to do life better.

This week is starting better. Even with much earlier mornings with Henry leaving for work earlier so he can be home earlier to be with Zoey so I can teach class, it's been great. We still have our coffee together in the morning, and after he leaves I've been back on the treadmill off a ridiculously long absence. Henry doesn't see Zoey before he leaves for work, but he's home to spend the whole evening with her instead. We feel a little calmer it seems, but time will tell. I am being observation to ensure Henry doesn't burn out with the early mornings, but he seems to enjoy the quiet morning drive and a chance to pray while he's alone in the shop for awhile.

So continue to pray for us, if you feel so inclined, as we continue to seek God and learn how to best navigate this amazing life we've been given.

The Things That Matter...

Months ago there was a massive grass fire in Lethbridge. My sister called and asked if we were okay. I was completely confused as we were oblivious to any of the drama unfolding around us. We had been quietly enjoying our Sunday afternoon until we got the call. As I was talking to her I went upstairs to have a look and I saw plumes of smoke behind the row of houses across from us. I called to Henry and asked him to come have a look, "We might have a problem..."

























That set in motion a flurry of information (via Facebook, Twitter, etc), a number of calls and texts (which made us feel incredibly loved and cared for), and some decision making. As it became clear the fire was quite close and as it was unclear what we were being told to do, we needed a plan. We weren't afraid of loosing our house or even our possessions, we weren't even unsure of where to go (Family and friends offered their homes within the hour), it was the uncertainty that made me nervous.

I think like most, I dislike the feeling of uncertainty or the lack of a plan. However, this was a lesson for me in Faith and Trust. Early in the evening I was trying to pack an emergency bag when I realized we hadn't prayed yet. I came downstairs and asked Henry to do that for us before we did anything else. With a greater sense of calm I packed was I thought we may need.

How surreal to pack the few items in your life that you think you 'need'. I focused on the items that I figured would keep us clothed and clean for a day or two, and moved to sentimental things. Outside of passports and birth certificates, I grabbed a baby book and Zoey's Boots (her stuffed animal) and Blankie. Everything else mattered very little as long as my family was safe.
















































It's a lesson I've been trying to reflect on continuously. It's so easy to become bogged down with the drama or struggles in day to day life and forget to focus on the treasures. Easier said than done, but I have some truly amazing gifts and blessings from God.

What would you pack?