Does anyone ever feel like they have no idea what they are doing in life and parenting? Anyone feel like you are royally screwing up your children? Good heavens I sure do! I'm hoping that over time that lessens as we see our children become self sustaining adults who hopefully go on to make their own good decisions.
I had a moment yesterday where I was plagued with doubts of my parenting ability. I am assuming it was brought on by a semi long afternoon of meltdowns and a need to be held every moment. In the light of a new day, even with it own challenges already, I see that while we had some 'moments' we had a great day together. We cleaned up, put away laundry together, baked snack and made some lasagna, listened to Adventures in Odyssey, she had a bath and so did the puppy. We wrapped the day at our Community Group which is always such a blessing. Zoey came with us this time and got to play with her friend who lives there. He's nearly twice her age but they do so well together it is so amazing for me to see. Since Zoey is a little shy, his personality helps direct her into an engaged playtime. So as we sat with our group wrapping our final chat about The Holy Spirit (Forgotten God by Francis Chan...read it!) Henry and I could see our quiet little girl bouncing and giggling with her friend.
It's in those moment God reminds me that despite my failings, our desire to raise Zoey and Roo in a God filled and directed household will be honored. It's shocking to think that truly, God loves our children even more than we possibly could and wants the best for them. If I want proof, really all I have to do is spend sometime just watching her play. She is beautiful, healthy, and so incredibly loving. And two.....sometimes I forget the impact that being two has on behavior and needs and it all come back into focus.
So I am trying to give us all a break and prayerfully remind myself that if I follow God in my parenting as well, Zoey will be be blessed in her future and growth.
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